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How to Read Someone Instantly

如何快速讀懂他人

Do you ever wish you could tell right away if someone is telling the truth or not? Or maybe you want to get a better feel for a date so you know if they're worth your time. There's no single way to know everything about a person right away. However, if you know what you're looking for, you can get a pretty good feel for who a person really is. Try asking yourself these questions when you meet someone—you might be surprised at the insight you get!

你是不是想立刻判斷出對方是不是撒謊了？或者也許你想對約會對象有更多了解，以便判斷是否值得花時間去相處。其實，并沒有一個單一的方法來立刻了解一個人的各個方面。但是，如果你知道自己正在尋找哪些信息，那么你可以對一個人的真正內在有一個清楚的了解。當你遇見某人時，請嘗試問自己以下問題，這些問題也許會讓你驚訝于自己的發現！

How are they dressed?

對方的著裝風格

Their outfit might offer clues about their personality or lifestyle. Look for anything that stands out about their fashion choices. Someone who's dressed in all-designer clothes might care too much about appearances and what others think of them. On the other hand, a young mom wearing a hoodie with jeans and a messy bun might be struggling to make time for herself.

他們的服裝可能會給你帶來有關其個性或生活方式的線索。了解他們在時尚選擇方面是否有不同之處。全身上下都是名牌的人可能會過分關注外表以及其他人對自己的看法。另一方面，身穿連帽衫配牛仔褲并且發髻看上去很亂的年輕媽媽很可能根本沒有屬于自己的時間。

?A brightly colored pair of socks might be a hint that they have a great sense of humor, or a nice watch might let you know that they care about being punctual.

?色彩明艷的襪子也許暗示穿著者非常具有幽默感，一塊講究的手表也許是讓你知道佩戴者非常在意守時。

?Someone who wears bright or bold clothing might be more comfortable with attention, while someone who opts for subdued styles in neutral tones might prefer to stay out of the limelight.

?穿著色彩明艷或設計大膽的服裝的人也許更能自如應對他人的目光，而選擇中性色調且樣式低調的人也許更傾向于避免成為注意的焦點。

?A person who wears edgy styles might be resistant to authority.

?穿著風格前衛的人也許會反抗權勢。

?Someone wearing classic, timeless styles might value tradition and predictability.

?穿著經典永恒款式的人也許重視傳統和可預見性。

?Look for items that signal their beliefs, too, like a bracelet with a religious symbol or a T-shirt from a brand that promotes wildlife conservation.

?尋找代表其信仰的物品，比如帶有宗教象征的手鐲或某個推崇保護野生動物品牌的T恤。

What are their facial expressions saying?

他們的面部表情都傳遞了哪些信息？

There are 6 basic emotions we express with our faces. These are joy, anger, surprise, fear, anger, sadness, and contempt, and they're usually pretty obvious clues to how someone is feeling. However, there are more subtle facial clues that can give you even more insight into what's going on. These might include:

我們會通過面部傳遞6種基本情感。這6種基本情感包括喜悅、憤怒、驚訝、恐懼、悲傷和蔑視。這些情感可以明顯透露主人的感受。然而，還有一些微妙的面部表情可以讓你了解更多對方的內心世界。這些面部表情包括：

?Raising their eyebrows if they're happy to see you

?如果他們很高興見到你，他們會揚起眉毛

?Crinkling their eyes if their smile is genuine

?如果他們的微笑是發自內心的，那么當他們微笑時，他們的眼睛會變小。

?Squinting their eyes if they disagree or they're confused

?當他們持反對意見或困惑時，他們的眼睛會瞇起來

?Pursing their lips could mean anger, bitterness, or contempt

?撅起嘴唇可能表示憤怒、痛苦或蔑視

?Clenching their jaw could be a sign of tension or anger

?咬緊牙關可能表示緊張或憤怒

?Showing their true expression for only a fraction of a second (known as a microexpression)

?僅在一瞬間展現其真實的感受（也叫作微表情）

Is the person making eye contact?

是否會進行眼神接觸

Eye contact is usually a sign that someone is confident. If someone makes eye contact with you when you meet them, it may mean that they're self-assured and comfortable in a social setting. If they won't meet your eyes, they may be uncertain of  themselves—although it's important to note that some people struggle with eye contact even if they're otherwise confident.

眼神接觸通常表示該人是否自信。如果有人在和你談話時會與你進行眼神接觸，那么這可能表示他們非常自信并且在社交場合感覺自在。如果他們不看你的眼睛，他們可能對自己不確定-盡管有一點很重要，那就是有些人盡管并不自信，他們也會努力進行眼神接觸。

?Pay attention to what else you can tell from the person's eyes. Do they seem warm and inviting or cold and hard? Are they genuinely interested in what you're saying? Do they look frustrated?

?留意自己從對方的目光中還可以了解到哪些信息。他們的眼神是否溫暖且主動還是冰冷冷酷？他們對你所講的內容是否真的感興趣？他們是否看上去很受挫？

Is their body language opened or closed?

肢體語言是開放的還是保守的

Their posture can tell you how comfortable they are. If the person is sitting or standing with their arms open and their shoulders back, they're probably feeling relaxed and confident. This can be a sign that they're open to interacting with you. On the other hand, if their arms are crossed and their shoulders are hunched, they might be trying to close themselves off, so they might be feeling nervous insecure, or they might be hiding something.

他們的姿勢會告訴你他們是否愉快放松。當一個人坐著或站著時手臂張開且肩膀靠后，那么他們很可能感到放松且自信。這可能代表他們愿意和你開誠布公。相反，如果他們雙臂交叉且肩膀高聳，他們也許嘗試把自己封閉起來，因此他們也許會感到緊張不安或也許他們在隱藏什么事情。

?Also, pay attention to their hands—if their fingers are far apart, they probably feel confident. If their hand is closed, they might be feeling less secure.

?同樣，注意他們的雙手-如果他們的手指是分開的，他們可能會很自信。如果他們的手是握在一起的，那么他們可能感覺缺乏安全感。

?Remember, this is just one possible clue to a person's overall demeanor and personality, On its own, it might not mean much, but when you put it with other mannerisms, you might be able to read deeper into the person.

?記住，這僅僅是一個可能暗示一個人整體行為舉止和個性的標志。這些動作本身并不代表什么，但是當你把它和其他行為聯系起來，你可能會對此人有更加深入的了解。

Do they seem relaxed or fidgety?

對方看上去很放松還是煩躁不安

Frequent fidgeting can be a sign that someone is stressed or nervous. You might notice them touching their face or hair, picking at their fingers, biting their lips, or tapping their foot. It can be hard to tell exactly what's making them feel nervous enough to fidget, so don't jump to conclusions. Just make note of it and see how it plays into your overall impression.

頻繁的煩躁不安可能代表某人有壓力或感到緊張。你可能會發現他們會摸自己的臉或頭發，拉手指，咬嘴唇或抖腳。想要準確知道是什么讓他們感到如此緊張以至于煩躁不安并不容易，所以不要輕易下結論。你只需要留意到這一點，然后看看它將如何影響你對他人的整體印象。

?Other nervous movements might include touching their neck, rubbing their hands together, or rubbing their chest.

?其他表示緊張的動作也許還包括摸脖子，搓手或撫弄胸口。

Are they finding reasons to touch you?

他們是否會找理由觸碰你？

Physical contact could mean they're attracted to you. If you're on a date or you're hanging out with someone you might be interested in, pay attention to whether they brush their hand, arm, or leg against you. These little touches could be their way of testing the waters to see if you're interested in them.

肢體接觸可能表示你對他們有吸引力。如果你正在和自己感興趣的對象約會或閑逛，注意他們是否會用自己的手、手臂或腿觸碰你。這些小的觸碰可能是他們用來測試看你是否對他們感興趣的方式。

?Watch how they are with others—do they frequently hug other people or pat them on the shoulder? If so, it could just be how they are with everyone.

?觀察他們與他人的互動方式-他們是否會經常和別人擁抱或拍拍對方的肩膀？如果是，那么這可能表示他們與所有人都是這樣互動的。

?Other signs the person finds you attractive include leaning their body toward you or subconsciously mirroring your movements.

?對方認為你具有吸引力的其他跡象還包括把身體靠向你或下意識地模仿你的動作。

How do they respond to basic questions?

他們如何回應基本的問題？

This can give you a baseline for their behavior. Try asking questions like, "Where are you from?" and, "What do you like to do for fun?" These are questions that most people will answer honestly, so they're a great way to get a feel for how that person acts when they're telling the truth.

他們的答案會讓你了解他們行為的底線。試著問這樣的問題，“你來自哪里？”、“你喜歡什么娛樂活動？”絕大多數人都會誠實回答這些問題，因此這些問題可以讓你很好地了解，當一個人說真話時的行為表現。

?Ask these questions in a warm, conversational way. The more comfortable you can make the person, the more authentic they'll be.

?用友好平常的方式問這些問題。你讓對方越愉快，他們也會越真誠。

?Note their tone of voice, how loudly they speak, their facial expressions, and their body language while they answer these basic questions.

?注意他們在回答這些基本問題時的語調，他們講話的音量，他們的面部表情以及他們的肢體語言。

What makes them deviate from their baseline?

什么使他們偏離了自己的底線？

Little changes can be a clue that they're uncomfortable. Once you see how the person seems when they're feeling relaxed and natural, it will be easier to tell when they feel tense, nervous, or upset. 

細微的改變可能暗示對方并不自在。一旦你已經看見過對方自然放松時的樣子，那么就會更加容易判斷出他們是否感到緊張或惱怒。

Understanding where these sensitive areas lie can provide insight into who that person is under the surface.

了解這些敏感區域所在可以讓你直視此人的內心。

?You might notice that they seem tense if you ask about their family, for instance. This is a good clue that their relationship is difficult.

?你也許會注意到，當你詢問，比如他們的家庭時，他們似乎看上去有些緊張。這就是一個很好的線索，這個線索可能表示對方家庭關系并不和諧。

?They might seem flushed or stammer when they talk about their job. This could be a sign that they feel insecure about what they do for a living.

?當談論其工作時，他們可能會臉紅或結結巴巴，那么這可能表示他們對自己賴以生存的工作感到不安。

?If they suddenly get louder while they're talking, you might have touched on something that makes them feel passionate or angry.

?如果他們在談論某事時，說話的聲音突然變大，那么你可能觸碰到讓他們感到充滿激情或生氣的話題。

Are there any tells that could indicate a lie?

判斷對方說謊的跡象

Some people might unconsciously signal when they're lying. Unfortunately, there's no universal giveaway that tells you someone's being dishonest. However, if a person does one of these things when they're talking, pay attention to what they just said—there's a chance it was untruthful. Some of these include:

當撒謊時，有人會下意識的發出信號。然而，并沒有普遍存在的方法來幫助你判斷對方是否撒謊。但是，如果一個人在談話時，會有如下動作，請留意他們所說的話-很有可能并不是真的。以下動作包括：

?Touching their face or hair

?觸碰臉或頭發

?Sweating a lot

?出很多汗

?Clearing their throat or taking a drink

?清嗓子或喝水

?Avoiding eye contact or staring

?避免眼神接觸或直視

?Speaking in a higher-pitched voice than normal

?音調比平時要高

?Using a lot of filler words like "um" or "ah"

?用大量的搪塞語言，比如“嗯嗯啊啊”

?Going pale in the face

?面色蒼白

?Darting their eyes back and forth

?眼神躲閃

?Blinking rapidly

?快速眨眼

Do they talk more than they listen?

他們說話的時間是否多過聆聽？

This can indicate that the person is self-centered. Do you feel like you have equal time to share your thoughts during a conversation? If a person doesn't make time to listen to the person they're talking to, they might struggle with qualities like empathy. It doesn't necessarily mean they're a bad person, but it can be helpful to know early on if someone tends to be self-absorbed.

這可能表示此人以自我為中心。你是不是希望在談話時，你也可以有同樣的時間來表達自己的想法？如果一個人不愿意花時間聆聽對方，他們可能不具備某些品質，比如同理心。這并非意味著對方是一個壞人，但是提前知道對方是不是只顧著關心自己也是有幫助的。

?If you leave the conversation feeling like they weren't interested in getting to know you, they might have a narcissistic personality.

?如果你談話后感覺對方并不想了解你，那么他們可能屬于自戀人格。

?However, some people get nervous and talk a lot when they're first meeting someone, so remember that this is just one piece of the overall puzzle.

?但是，也有些人當和別人第一次見面時，他們會緊張并會說很多話，因此記住這僅僅是此人的部分表現。

Do they brag about their possessions or accomplishments?

他們是否會對自己所擁有的或成就夸夸其談？

They might be trying to impress you. Some people feel like it's important to get the approval of others. If you're chatting with someone and they constantly reference how much money they make, how many cars they have, or how many Insta followers they have, they might be obsessed with appearances.

他們可能嘗試給你留下深刻印象。有些人認為獲得其他人的認可非常重要。如果你在和某人聊天，對方經常提及自己賺了多少多少錢，自己擁有多少輛車或者他們的微博有多少粉絲，他們可能對表面的事情很沉迷。

?This might make the person seem arrogant, but it can actually be a sign that deep down they struggle with some insecurities.

?這也許讓此人看上去有些傲慢，但實際上在他們的內心深處，他們可能會有些不安全感。

Do they talk badly about other people?

他們是否會說其他人的壞話？

Gossip can be a sign of a toxic personality. Chances are, if someone is willing to badmouth others when they're not around, they'll do the same thing to you. If you notice this, it's probably best to steer clear of any close personal relationships with that person.

嚼舌根則可能表示此人人品有問題。如果有人在他人背后說壞話，那么他們也會同樣對你。如果你注意到了這一點，最好立刻遠離此人。

?For instance, if you're on a date and someone has a lot of negative things to say about their ex, it could be a sign they aren't accepting responsibility for their part in what went wrong.

?比如，如果你正在和某人約會，某人說了很多有關前任的壞話，那么則可能表示他們不愿意對自己做的不好的地方負責。

Could any cultural differences be affecting your impression?

文化差異是否會對你的印象造成影響？

Take into account how that might affect their body language. It can be hard to read someone if you're judging them solely by your own experiences. For instance, in some cultures, it's impolite to make eye contact. If you don't take that into consideration, you might feel like the person is being dishonest because they won't meet your eyes.

考慮一下文化差異會對肢體語言產生哪些影響。如果僅憑自己的經驗來判斷，那么則很難了解對方。比如，在某些文化里，與對方進行眼神接觸是不禮貌的。如果你不將這一點考慮在內，你可能會認為此人并不誠實。

?A person's culture might also impact how close to you they stand, how they shake hands, and even how quickly they respond after you ask them a question.

?一個人的文化也會影響到他站立時會離你有多近，他們握手的方式，甚至是在你問他們問題時，他們的響應時間。

What is your gut telling you?

你的直覺是什么？

Add everything up, then add in your intuition. There are a lot of clues you can use to get a feel for someone, but there are also things that aren't so easy to define, like what kind of energy they're projecting. If you get a certain feeling about someone, ask yourself where it's coming from, and watch for evidence that tells you whether the feeling was right or wrong.

除了上述線索外，再加上你的直覺。你可以通過許多線索來了解某人，但是也有許多方面是很難定義的，比如他們散發出哪種能量。如果某人給你一種感覺，問問自己這種感覺從何而來，然后尋找證據來判斷這種感覺到底是錯還是對的。

?For example, if your intuition tells you that someone is sad, you might be subconsciously picking up on hints that you don't notice right away. Later, you might realize the person kept their eyes down and spoke in a low tone for most of the conversation.

?比如，如果你的直覺告訴你，對方很悲傷，那么你可能會下意識的尋找一些你并沒有立刻注意到的細節。隨后，你可能會發現，在談話的大部分時間里，對方的目光一直下垂并且說話的聲音非常低。

?Intuition isn't always perfect, but with time and experience, you can learn to hone your instincts about people.

?直覺并非總是完美的，但是隨著時間和經驗的累積，你可以學會慢慢用直覺來了解對方。

文章來源：Wikihow      翻譯&編輯：譯銳翻譯Susan